Why must I be so hard-headed?

Yesterday I had big plans!!! A day I envisioned to be filled with lots of fun, laughter and memories. None, zilch, not one of my plans happened. Needless to say, I was heart-broken. I was left to sit and stew over my sad state of affairs. I allowed lots of negativity flood my mind. I questioned myself as to why? Why was I trying so hard? Why did I even care? Why was I allowing all this to happen? Why do I even bother? Why? Why? Why? Yes I was basically pouting and having a good old fashion pity party for one. 

In the mist of this party, a visitor showed up at my door. Out of the blue, no prior phone call, no advanced planning.  One of my closest friends, whom I don't get to see much, popped in to see me. We sat and caught up on all the news for a little over an hour. As I walked her to her car, I told her I knew God had sent her by today and I explained to her why I felt that way. In acknowledging that, I felt the weight of the burdens starting to lift... that was until I walked back into the gloom and doom that hung in the air of my home. I allowed it to surround me again.

I carried and stewed over my feelings till I forced myself to bed at 2am. I awoke feeling drained and tired. How heavy my burdens still seemed this morning.  In my stubborn, hard headed way I was still stewing over how hurt I still felt and started to reminisce about the visit from my friend. I suddenly realized that she had shared with me some sad shocking news about a mutual friend and his family and that I had not taken the time to pray for them. How could I have not done this when they mean so much to me and they were in desperate need of my prayers? I immediately went to prayer for them and also asked God for forgiveness in not thanking Him for sending my friend to my rescue. After praying, my burdens are lifting. I am now able and ready to lay them in His hands and let him work it out.

I know that you may not see my friend's unplanned visit as God's work, but I do. She may not have realized it either. God knows our hearts. He knows our pain and struggles. He knows how to reach out to us to help. He often answers prayers before we even pray for them. Thank you God for loving me in spite of  hard headed stubborn self!!